Sunday, November 16, 2008

Sunday night mind purge

- Monday was busy; Mondays are my administrative day where I try to get as much of the office work done as I can so I can focus on relational ministry during the rest of the week. So many tasks + new responsibilities = not enough time.

- I can hardly wait until Sunday, November 30th when I can finally break the big, exciting news!!! I'm so ready to talk about it, process it together, and do community with my youth ministry family.

- Tuesday at lunch was Youth for Christ at Hanks. I'll admit, I was close to losing heart and giving up, but it was so refreshing and revitalizing to see so many new people come in and leave looking like they had enjoyed themselves. Also, John Stout from Montwood Church of the Nazarene (he was our guest speaker) ...he's pretty cool.

- Tuesday afternoon was staff meeting. We watched a video that's been making us process things a bit more. I really want Del Sol Church to be a preview of Heaven, culturally, racially, and economically speaking.

- Wednesday was another busy day. I didn't get everything done on Monday that I needed to, so there was a bit more admin work to be done. Ughh ...I sent the wrong writeup for Sunday's program to Lydia, our administrative assistant. Oh well ...

- Thursday was the Mix. The band did pretty good, and our Lead Pastor Walter Mueller preached, and several people made commitments to follow Christ. WOO!!!!

- Friday was my day off, and it started out pretty relaxing. My, how things can change in a day. I started out by sleeping in (always a good thing), then exercised a bit, lounged around, then cleaned up and went to have lunch. Lunch was nice, and afterwards I went to see Jeremy and Tara and little 4 day old Corbin Jacob Kroeker. He's amazing - I could have just stared at CJ for hours ...what a miracle! I got to hang out with the Kroekers for awhile, then I drove around the northeast praying for it and praying for the city, asking God to do something great in our city.

I then went to the mall and got some new pants, a pair of jeans, and a long sleeve henley since it's gettin' cold these days. I was having a pretty great day all in all, and then I got home.

Without going into too many details, suffice it to say that when I got home, there was some incredible tension brewing because of some extended family stuff that's going on and I literally stepped right into the middle of it when I walked in the door. Allegations had been made specifically against my mom, my dad, and even my brothers and I that could have caused us great legal trouble.

The tension tide had been rising the past few months and I had kept my mouth shut, but this time I had had it! I had to pray like crazy as I opened my mouth, laid out the truth, exposed lies and gossip, confronted the people who had been lying and gossiping, and told everyone there that I was not going to stand for this any more.

My immediate family, and mostly my mom, had put up with enough crap, we had overlooked enough lies, we had put up with injustice aimed directly against us, and my parents' marriage and my mom's mental health was really taking an emotional tool - so Friday night, I said enough! I put my foot down, defended my mom and my dad, and told the others involved that I am not going to put up with it anymore and I'm not going to let my home fall apart because of someone else's lies!

That was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but it's amazing how right Jesus was when He said in John 8:32 that the truth will set you free. My blatant exposure of how things really are, even though it greatly hurt some people, somehow was the catalyst for some incredible honesty and relational mending. Things aren't perfect, but I honestly feel like after years of division, some bridges were mended and some hurts were healed. I was worried that I might have overstepped my bounds and stepped on my dad's toes, but my parents both told me they were really glad I did what I did.

But man ...that was an incredibly angering and emotionally draining night - especially for my Sabbath "day off." =)

- Saturday, I woke up still totally drained, but somehow managed to clean out my dad's SUV and to clean mine out, and do cleaning around the house.

- Saturday night I met with a couple of my guys and we went to the UTEP football game. It was SO great! Somehow in the past few years, because of my schedule I've managed to only go to 1 game a season, and I'd been waiting for this one since August. I had a REALLY great time with the guys, the Miners won, and we actually were allowed by one security guard to go into a place where the public isn't allowed and spend a few minutes looking at the ACTUAL Sun Bowl trophy until another security guard asked us to leave. That was so cool, and I only wish I had taken a picture of it. Wow, how cool was that?!

- I didn't even get home 'til about midnight, then wasn't able to fall asleep 'til around 1 am.

- I was a few minutes late to band practice this morning at 8, and by the time I go the first worship celebration at 9:30 am, I felt physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually drained. I walked in while the band was leading worship, and I just lost it. I just cried and cried and could barely even sing. I wasn't sure if I'd make it through the morning, especially having to teach at 11 am.

- By God's grace, He took over and I made it through the 11 am gathering, then came home, had a quick lunch, and crashed. I slept 'til around 6 pm.

- Now I'm here ...and I have 2 Bible studies and a sermon for Thursday that I'm studying for.

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