Tuesday, February 14, 2012

How to be single and thrive on Valentine's Day.

Today is Valentine's Day. For many, today is the day of love, chocolate, flowers, kisses, hugs, romance, and all things red & pink. For many others, today isn't Valentine's Day; it's Singles Awareness Day. As a single person you have a choice today: you can survive today, or you can thrive today.

The truth is, God doesn't want you to just survive this day - He wants you to thrive! Here are some ideas I have on how to be single and thrive on Valentine's Day:

1. Don't buy the lie. Lots of single people think that nobody will ever love them and that they will be alone the rest of their lives. As a single person, I understand why sometimes it could seem like that's true, but it's not. It's a lie. You will not always be alone. Someday, when God in His goodness knows the time is right, you will have that unexpected and beautiful collision of your heart with someone else's. So don't buy the lire that you will be single all your life.

2. Celebrate the love that others have. Don't be jealous and angry that someone else has a love to celebrate today and you don't. Don't be upset at your friends for having someone special in their life. You're better than that. Maturity is when you can truly celebrate that someone else already has what you've been wanting. Immaturity is when you're so selfish that you think "if I can't have it, nobody can" and you can't celebrate that someone else is happy. Celebrate that people around you are happy. Don't be bitter; be better.

3. Count your blessings. And by "blessings" I mean all the money you're saving today! You don't have to buy anyone overpriced flowers, chocolates, or cards. You don't have to get all dressed up after a long day at work and go to dinner a busy restaurant, or do the work to cook a fancy dinner for two. As wonderful as all that is, you don't have to mess with that right now. You can just order pizza or get a burger and lounge around at home. Until the day comes when you're with someone, enjoy the single life. And really enjoy all the money and hassle you're saving today.

4. Treat yourself special. Today is a day of love. God loves you. He delights in you. So do something special today to enjoy all His goodness.Maybe that means buying yourself some chocolate, or a flower to brighten up your coffee table, or a bacon double cheeseburger with onion rings and a large Dr. Pepper. Who said you can't spoil yourself a little today?

5. Collect date ideas. Someday you won't be single. And today lots of your friends are doing some very sweet, thoughtful, and romantic things for their main squeezes. Take notes of what works and what doesn't. File away ideas to use for when you have a main squeeze of your own.

6. Dream a little. Think about your ideal guy or girl. Ladies, look up wedding stuff online.  Guys, work on your cheezy pick-up lines. Imagine what your life will be like when you are in love. Go ahead - get your hopes up.

7. Do some self-evaluation. Do NOT bash yourself. Do NOT put yourself down. Do NOT get depressed. But DO honestly evaluate yourself. Think about this question: "Am I the kind of person the person I'm looking for is looking for?" You might need to read that a few times to let it sink in, but that's a REALLY good question to ask yourself. It's something I've been asking myself a lot lately. Look at the love chapter in the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13, and wherever it says "Love is ___", replace the word "love" with your name. Then ask if you are the things that God says love is. Figure out where you have some room to grow, then do work. Become the person that the person you're looking for is looking for.

8. Serve someone else.  John 3:16 says that God so loved the world that He gave. Love is a verb, not a noun. It's an action, not a feeling. To love is to serve. So do something to serve someone else today. Speak words of affirmation to someone today. Give someone a genuine compliment. Pay for the order of the person behind you in the drive-thru line when you go get your bacon double cheeseburger for dinner. Give someone a hug. Remember, to love is to serve. What better way to celebrate the day of love than to serve someone else?

So there you go - those are my thoughts on how to thrive as a single person this Valentine's Day. I bet if you do even just a few of these 8 things I've listed, you will have a really great day today.

And hey ...I want you to know ...I love you.

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